Tag Archives: NFL

Patriots Receive White House Support

FOXBORO, MA – The New England Patriots, after recent sanctions levied against them for spying on the New York Jets play callers during the first week of the NFL season by NFL Commissioner Roger Goodell, have received attention from not only the panorama of the NFL, but also the George W. Bush White House. After […]

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Lush For Life’s 2007 NFL Preview

NEW YORK – As the forthcoming NFL football season approaches, professional football junkies, fantasy league participants, gambling degenerates, and stats fiends have found themselves in a belligerent frenzy for kickoff weekend spreads, and have become waiting sponges for info on third-string flier backups and their stat lines in all-night ESPN viewing binges. With so much […]

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NFL Conspiracies Run Rampant

This story was received at Lush For Life Headquarters via wire transfer on the morning of Sunday, January 21 from senior staff writer Danny Albertson.  Mr. Albertson has not been seen for several weeks and has decided to enter into hiding.  In fear for the safety of himself and others, Mr. Albertson’s location will remain […]

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Poor TV Broadcasts Lead To Rash Of Injuries In NFL

“PHILADELPHIA – Further inquiry conducted by the Lush For Life investigative staff has revealed new startling answers to the cause of the recent knee injury sustained by Philadelphia Eagles quarterback Donovan McNabb on November 19. McNabb sustained a complete tear to his medial collateral ligament – an injury that will require eight to twelve months […]

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Limbaugh Responsible For T.O. Overdose

“DALLAS – The recent drug overdose by Dallas Cowboys’ flamboyant and outspoken wide receiver Terrell Owens – which was originally reported as a suicide attempt – is now being reported as a botched pharmaceutical and alcohol binge between Owens and right-wing talk radio personality Rush Limbaugh. Initial reports early this morning out of Dallas was […]

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LushForLife.com 2006 NFL Preview

TAMPA – Already come and gone is week one of the NFL season. So you dear readers out there in infinite cyberspace may be asking yourself, why the hell are they doing a preview of a season that has already begun? First off, I’d like to eliminate any shadow of doubt that I was alive […]

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Karr Not Ramsey’s Killer

“BOULDER, CO – The alleged murderer John Mark Karr, who confessed to killing six-year old JonBenet Ramsey a decade ago in a statement last week, has recently been acquitted of all possible wrongdoing by Boulder law enforcement officials, allegedly on the grounds of being a complete liar. “”After the conclusion of a recent investigation our […]

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The 2005 NFL Season In Review

DETROIT – After tuning into another season of twenty-two raw and dizzying weeks of highly-anticipated professional football, gnawing at our brains, the majority of us football fans – who on a weekly basis find ourselves stuffing our respective gullets with gallons of untamed and brutal whiskeys, porters, ales, and other distilled delicacies, along with massive […]

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NFL Abandons Conspiracy Plot, Sources Say

NEW YORK, NY – After learning of an article posted on LushForLife.com by this journalist regarding a conspiracy involving the murder of Indianapolis Colts coach Tony Dungy’s son in order to level the playing field in the National Football League playoffs, league officials abandoned the tampering attempt, reportedly just before halftime of the AFC divisional […]

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NFL Suicide Conspiracy Uncovered

NEW YORK, NY – A recent investigation conducted by LushForLife.com investigators at the National Football League’s headquarters in New York City has revealed startling facts regarding the alleged suicide of Indianapolis Colts head coach Tony Dungy’s son. (more…)

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“Men’s Health” Ranked Worst Magazine In The US

Tampa – With recent criticism for its nonsensical “Frown Town” article about the saddest cities in America, which placed St. […]

RIM To Release Crackberry Standard And Pro

crackberry

This week has seen some of the most exciting developments in recent memory for many mobile phone journalists and enthusiasts. […]

“Tase Me, Bro!” Says Sadomasochistic USF Student

TAMPA, FL − University of South Florida student Jay Myers, 22, was arrested and Tasered on Monday night by University […]

Danny’s Sports Box

No Bull… To the delight of thousands of USF fans, the South Florida Bulls football team, which has entered only […]

Patriots Receive White House Support

FOXBORO, MA – The New England Patriots, after recent sanctions levied against them for spying on the New York Jets […]