WASHINGTON – As Washington seethes with plans to find a way out of the Iraq debacle, Al Qaeda has struck its own blow at the U.S.

In its first major operation on American soil since 9/11, Al Qaeda operatives infiltrated the perimeter of the White House and abducted George W. Bush’s staunchest supporter. Continue Reading

WASHINGTON – Workaholism continues to be in style in Washington as Nancy Pelosi’s Democrats go all out to prove that they are do-something legislators.

Lush For Life could not get an interview with Pelosi this week, but Minority Whip Republican Trent Lott had time to talk to us. Continue Reading

CRYSTAL RIVER, FL – Two teenagers put on eye make-up, but still look like jailbait, acquaintances say.

Hilary Sbarc and Veronica Dexter, referred to by their classmates as best friends forever, or BFF, invested in twenty-two dollars worth of eye-makeup last Thursday, in hopes of looking older and attracting older guys they meet at the mall. Continue Reading

TEMPE, AZ – Following a week of surprising events within the football universe, including a number of unexpected upsets, bizarre happenings, and of all things – a death – the validity of what is being witnessed has been called into question by our gifted investigative team here at Lush For Life Headquarters.  Continue Reading

We’re going into print! Friday, January 12th 2007, Lush For Life will be distributing our first 20,000 copies of our new print edition. Come join us at the Crowbar in Ybor City (1812 17th Street) for music, fashion and of course, the best satirical comedy the world has ever seen, ever (ever). Don’t miss out Lush Progress (no relation) – the hottest new band in the bay area, and so many other bands that the price of admission is a steal – especially considering the paper is free! There will be free drinks, live music, beautiful women, hunky guys (us) and some of the funniest people you’ll ever meet, just hangin around waiting to talk to your drunk ass. So come on down!

Chimps welcome. Myspace: http://www.myspace.com/slantedsynergy