The following NSA transcript was leaked to the offices of LushForLife.com by a reliable source inside the White House.
Dad?
Hi George.
Dad?
George, I can’t hear you. Turn the phone around.
Dad. It’s George.
Yeah, I know.
It’s terrible, Daddy.
Did Barney escape again?
Nope, got him right here. But almost as bad. Kenny’s dead.
Kenny Lay? How?
Lynched.
George, do you know what lynched means?
Hold on… wait, maybe not that. I thought that’s what Karl said.
Yeah, he probably did.
Wait, here it is. The doctors say it was the heart that did it.
Ah.
Yup, the poor little thing must have just stopped beating. I don’t blame it: Kenny’s big boat was taken away.
It’s always the best that go first. That sonuvabitch was like Jesus.
Dad, I think you’re wrong. I know what Jesus looked like.
No, son. Inside. He was like the Big J inside, George
Like his guts and stuff?
No, boy. He was a humanitarian.
Hold on… wait, how’d you spell that?
H… U… N… He did good things for people, is what I mean. Gave them money and all.
Yeah, Pa. He gave us a lot of that.
Will you be going to the funeral, George?
Nah. I wanted to, but Karl forbade it. I don’t look good in black anyway.
Don’t worry, Georgie. Ma and I will go with the gang. He was a good man.
Yeah, Dad. A good Hungarian.
That’s right, George. A good Hungarian.
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