Lush For Life

PALM BEACH, FL – In yet another attempt to slander the good name of the world’s greatest radio talk show host, Rush Limbaugh, the liberal media has once again turned to made-up prescription drug scandals.

TAMPA – By now, we have all heard Larry King’s ads for the super-vitamin, Ester-C. It is marketed to the old and the feeble (usually mutually exclusive), and is pimped between Paul Harvey segments.

NEW YORK – A press conference held today at Fangoria Magazine’s Park Avenue headquarters revealed the monthly publication’s plans to feature a detailed photo shoot of pop star Britney Spears’ upcoming pregnancy.

HEAVEN – A recent visit to Heaven with LushForLife.com correspondent, and close confidant of mine Arthur Rocks proved to be a truly…enlightening…experience.

BERLIN, GERMANY – As the final few games of the 2006 FIFA World Cup finish up and we head into the “Round of 16 Elimination”, ESPN and ABC’s ratings are starting to trickle in, stunning the critics. Reaching between 2 and 3 percent of cable TV viewers in the US, the 2006 World Cup is [...]

SWAMPWATER, FL – Beads of dew reflect off of the blades of grass in the humid city of Swampwater, Florida, a small ringworm harvesting community with a love for Jesus and down-home traditions. I came here looking for answers… answers to why so many alligator attacks have been going on.

My son came by the other day – he’d been to one of his MBA Marketing lectures. “What’s another name for marketing?” he demanded, as he dug in the fridge for food and beer. “Bullshit! Marketing is a synonym for bullshit!”

BUTTE, MT – In a joint press conference held on Thursday by the heads of a plethora of terrorist groups, the subject arose of President Bush’s recent Baghdad visit and their renewed vow of solidarity in the complete hatred of the United States and its people.

LUTZ, FL – In the ongoing media feeding frenzy that is the latest sensationalized sub-par journalistic pig’s vomit, alligators are this season’s avian-flu, with bags and shoes to match. The continuous flow of dangers described to us by an obviously concerned, albeit psychotic media, have started to sound weak, even to the most paranoid press-passer.

TAMPA – A surprising study published by the World Health Organization (WHO… not the rock band) has rocketed a new issue above global warming, terrorism, and avian-flu: bullshit.