Archive | October, 2005

Man in Boston Dies of Cooties

Man in Boston Dies of Cooties

Posted on 25 October 2005 by Danny Albertson

BOSTON – A man in Boston, MA, abruptly died last week, ailing from a mutated form of the once believed imaginary childhood disease Cooties, according to doctors at Massachusetts General Hospital in Boston. Continue Reading

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White House Issues Cease-And-Desist Letter to The Onion

White House Issues Cease-And-Desist Letter to The Onion

Posted on 25 October 2005 by Duncan Idaho

WASHINGTON – The White House, residence of the present resident president, is apparently not amused by the humor site’s use of the Presidential Seal on a parody of a presidential radio broadcast. The Onion, a site much like LushForLife.com, only less funny, has been a long upstanding member of the fake news industry and a staple of people who like clicking on funny pictures only to find that they have no story to go along with them. Continue Reading

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Putting the Lard Back into Christmas

Putting the Lard Back into Christmas

Posted on 25 October 2005 by Gale Force

LIVERPOOL, UK – So many of us have too much … too much junk, too much email, and too much blubber on our waists, thighs and buttocks.

The season for giving comes once a year. Liverpool plastic surgeon, Dr Evan Stephens, believes we could all give more, and with deeper feeling, and feel better about ourselves for it. Continue Reading

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Jesus Decides to Let the People Choose Next God

Jesus Decides to Let the People Choose Next God

Posted on 25 October 2005 by Danny Albertson

LAS VEGAS – After several weeks of deliberation between Christian bureaucrats in Heaven and on Earth led to no conclusion, Jesus has decided to not appoint a new God himself; he will allow the people of both Earth and Heaven decide who the next Holy Redeemer will be in the form of a democratic vote. Continue Reading

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Letter from the Editor

Letter from the Editor

Posted on 25 October 2005 by Egbert Sousé

Dearest Reader,

We at L4L have enjoyed bringing you, the beloved reader, nothing but the best in first-class fictional entertainment. Since we started this little hole-in-the-wall website, Continue Reading

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President Tours New Orleans

President Tours New Orleans

Posted on 19 October 2005 by Edward Payne

NEW ORLEANS – President Bush was upbeat today at a mid-afternoon press conference given amidst the muddy ruins of New Orleans, expressing hope that “a better city will soon rise from these ashes.” He outlined in broad terms his administration’s plan to rebuild the city “along the lines of what our marketing guys say will give it a much broader-based appeal, which can only translate into a better bottom line for New Orleans and for America.” Continue Reading

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On the Set: XXX3

On the Set: XXX3

Posted on 18 October 2005 by Danny Albertson

BURBANK, CA – A recent visit to Warner Bros. Studios in Burbank, CA, revealed that the production company, in cooperation with Twentieth Century Fox and Cube Vision, are currently filming the next sequel in the “XXX” action/adventure series. The new installment, entitled “XXX3: Do the Math” (pronounced ‘Triple X Cubed’), has received the financial support of two of the largest production studios in Hollywood to get the project off the ground, with a budget currently being projected at $300 million, sources said. Actor/Rap Artist Ice Cube is producing and currently slated to direct the film, and has also been an integral part of getting the massively budgeted project off the ground. Continue Reading

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T.O. Relief Fund To Be Founded

T.O. Relief Fund To Be Founded

Posted on 18 October 2005 by Danny Albertson

TAMPA, FL – The Board of Directors here at LushForLife.com said today in a press release that the news organization plans on founding a relief fund for Philadelphia Eagles wide receiver Terrell Owens and his immediate family, according to LushForLife.com Senior Executive Duncan Idaho. Continue Reading

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October Horoscopes

October Horoscopes

Posted on 01 October 2005 by James Avalon

Aries: Don’t fly on planes.


Taurus: Your hot temper and stubborn attitude will cause those close to you to keep their distance. In short, no one likes you…kill yourself. Continue Reading

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