Talk Show Host Hendrie Revealed

LOS ANGELES – Talk radio personality Phil Hendrie, host of The Phil Hendrie Show, a comedy program which broadcasts on talk radio affiliates across the country, allegedly does not air “fake guests”: the voices heard on his program are actually the voices of real people proposing ridiculous and outlandish opinions, sources said.

For the last billion years Hendrie has been broadcasting his comedy show, during which he speaks in a fake voice as a guest of the show, and then essentially interviews himself about a number of sensitive and politically incorrect current events. After establishing a ridiculous stance on an issue, the joke is on real listeners who call his program and voice their displeasure with the guest’s opinion. It has recently been discovered by field reporters for LushForLife.com that Mr. Hendrie has not been faking these voices – his interviews are done with real people with real opinions.

Larry Kroeger, managing director of XTRA-AM 570 in Los Angeles, said to LushForLife.com:

“Mr. Hendrie has full creative control for his radio show, as he always has. Whether he uses real voices or fake ones is unknown to me.” Kroeger went on to say, “Sometimes we’ll receive complaint mail for Phil, as well as the occasional death threat, but issues like that are usually few and far between and are taken with a grain of salt. All in all, the ratings are higher than they’ve ever been, so I won’t challenge Mr. Hendrie’s professional expertise.”

To gain further facts, I was sent to Los Angeles to try and track down some of Mr. Hendrie’s repeat guests, to see if these people really did exist. My first mission was to find and interview Ted Bell, who according to the show, is a local businessman who owns various upscale restaurants around the greater Los Angeles area; most notably Ted’s of Beverly Hills.

This month, my expense account at LushForLife.com has been severely drained due to my constant transit and excessive drinking habits, so I was forced to stay at the La Quinta Inn on San Vicente Blvd. once arriving in L.A. – quite a stiff gallop down the food chain from my usual luxurious suite Duncan Idaho normally provides. On my journey down to the lobby to retrieve a bucket of ice for the complimentary Bacardi I found in my room, I asked the hotel attendant if she had heard of Mr. Bell’s snooty and infamous steakhouse, Ted’s of Beverly Hills. She told me that it did in fact exist, and that she has always wanted to dine there, but she was not permitted because she is a Mexican-American.

According to interviews on the show, Mr. Bell has always implemented a strict policy on not allowing minorities of all kinds to dine at his establishment – his reason being that no Blacks, Hispanics, or any other race other than Caucasian, for that matter, would be able to afford the steep prices he charges for dining, and also they wouldn’t be able to completely enjoy the food either, because in his words, “They don’t know what a $100 steak should taste like anyway. I am Ted Bell, not Taco Bell”.

When I pulled into the Ted’s of Beverly Hills valet line, the valet drivers instantly turned away after noticing I was driving a Nissan Sentra rental car. After I got out of the vehicle and they saw that I was white, one attendant grabbed my keys as the other politely escorted me inside. I told them I was from Zagat’s Guide as I flashed a bogus business card, and that I wanted to speak with Mr. Bell and ordered a Bacardi on the rocks with a lime.

Our interview was cut a little short after Mr. Bell discovered I was not sent by Zagat’s to review his restaurant, because they had reviewed it a week prior. I was able to find out that Bell and Hendrie are old friends, and Mr. Bell often calls Mr. Hendrie’s radio show as a regular guest. When he asked who I worked for, I asked to excuse myself because my cellular phone was ringing, and as I rushed out of the restaurant, I slinged my drink in the doorman’s face as he tried to block me from exiting. I had to leave the rental in the parking lot – a minor setback – but my ultimate goal was achieved: Ted Bell is real, and so are his phone calls to the Phil Hendrie Show.

My next step was to speak with Phil Hendrie himself, and possibly get him to confirm that his callers are in fact real. When I went to XTRA-AM 570, I was not granted entry because I did not have the proper credentials. It is my contention, however, that Ted Bell in all likelihood gave Hendrie the heads up that there may be a strange individual coming to speak with him within the next couple of days regarding the falseness, or validity, rather, of his radio show, and due to this tip I was unable to speak with him. This is surely a setback, but I will continue this in-depth investigation no matter how far I have to travel to uncover the facts, because to this reporter and Hendrie fan, the real comedy lies within the minds of these deranged individuals.

NEXT INSTALLMENT:

“Salut! The Quest for R.C. Collins and Code Red

Comments

comments

Tags: ,

One Response to “Talk Show Host Hendrie Revealed” Subscribe

  1. shaggy16 April 21, 2007 at 10:38 pm #

    What happened with R.C? Fun read.

Leave a Reply

“Men’s Health” Ranked Worst Magazine In The US

Tampa – With recent criticism for its nonsensical “Frown Town” article about the saddest cities in America, which placed St. […]

RIM To Release Crackberry Standard And Pro

crackberry

This week has seen some of the most exciting developments in recent memory for many mobile phone journalists and enthusiasts. […]

“Tase Me, Bro!” Says Sadomasochistic USF Student

TAMPA, FL − University of South Florida student Jay Myers, 22, was arrested and Tasered on Monday night by University […]

Danny’s Sports Box

No Bull… To the delight of thousands of USF fans, the South Florida Bulls football team, which has entered only […]

Patriots Receive White House Support

FOXBORO, MA – The New England Patriots, after recent sanctions levied against them for spying on the New York Jets […]